Samsung Galaxy SX Edge Plus

So, it's been a while since I was all like "holy shit you guys there's a new fancy phone out and it's real suave lookin and maybe I daydream about it when the commercials come on" ... like maybe since the pink RAZR, then the first iPhone which was bought for me as a gift... jeezus. Okay moving on.

I didn't even know this phone that I can't show you a picture of without a real convoluted process because it is IN MY HANDS was one of them newfangled things until I had committed to the idea of getting a new phone sometime around my birthday. I knew it existed but I didn't know it was, like, the new release hot shit phone until... well that point.

Okay, blah blah blah. 

I CAN CUSTOMIZE MY PHONE WITH A SPACE THEME. But not only is it a space theme, it's like a Lisa Frank meets Android bot meets Mario Bros. meets maybe Paul Frank in a coffee shop and does one of those 'sup?' nods space theme.

SPACE THEME

SPACE THEME

AND it has a 16 megapixel camera--and other cool ass shit that you literally cannot do with an iPhone because it's NOT an iPhone, it's a Samsung Galaxy S6 Edge Plus and I always say "SX" instead of S6 but I'm working on it, but then again I also transpose my colloquialisms and that can be charming so why can't misnomer-ing my phone?

It's superdope. 

AT&T doesn't really do actual upgrades anymore, they do loyal-customer-not-terrible-pay-history finance plans. Which means I put a whole lotta no-money-except-taxes down on this puppy and now I'm an indentured servant for two years.

But I'm so enamored with my shiny (the color is titled Black Sapphire* I mean come ON rrrrowr) new gadget that my dopamine levels will probably be above average for at least 3 months and at that point my productivity will--we're speaking in hypothetical ideal terms here people--be through the roof and sustain me for the next 17 months.

...I'll I keep you posted.

*Also I'm a Virgo, our birthstone is Sapphire, it was just my birthday, life is good, dreamy, delicious, love.

I don't even care that I'm talking about a minicomputer I hold in my hands and pretend is a phone. I give no shits, except the kind where I'm like YEAH! Not the kind where I'm like UHG why am I EVEN.

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Okay I have at least one complaint, no emdash in the symbols on the keyboard. I use emdashes WAY TOO OFTEN so it's a little disorienting/alarming/uncomfortable not to have that right there at my beck and call... beckon call? Shit.